I’m a baby, please touch me
By Jayne Warren - 27/07/2007
Gurmeet Hans from Slough, has started special courses to revive an ancient tradition - baby massage, using Indian and Swedish massage techniques, reflexology and yoga. And she is urging grandparents to learn her simple, gentle techniques, not just for their own grandchildren, but to be passed down the generations.
Grandparents now provide a huge amount of care for young babies: five million each spend the equivalent of three days a week caring for their grandchildren, and 1% have grandchildren living with them. According to The Grandparents’ Association, 82% of children receive some care from their grandparents.
Gurmeet, who is also a life coach and parenting skills practitioner, spoke to the Mature Times about her experiences of baby massage: “I recall in the 1960s when I was little, every weekend my mother gave me a head massage, using warm oil in the winter. It was a sweet memory of a luxury I have cherished all my life.
“And when I became a mother twenty years ago, back in Mumbai, my mother came to live with me briefly to support me with my new baby in the early days. Unlike my own state of feeling quite helpless and over anxious in my new role, she did everything with ease - I teased her that she had practised on us!
"My mother showed me how to massage my baby son. And as she massaged my son, she sang little songs to him, often made up with her own words. She talked to him and he seemed to talk to her. She then helped me to adopt comfortable postures to do it myself, and the rest followed - talking, listening, singing, rocking. I loved it and my baby boy loved it!
"For the last four years I have been teaching parents to massage their babies, and can see the process I went through repeated again in parents, grandparents and carers. Across all ages and situations, from teenage mothers, mature mums, first time parents, those with older children and post natal depression to grandparents and foster carers, the group learning atmosphere of the baby massage course is quite remarkable.
"And the feedback I have is always the same: the baby loves the massage, sleeps better, feels better, cries less, looks happier, laughs, and is more relaxed. The baby massage also relieves colic and constipation. But by far the biggest feedback is how much the relationship between the baby and carer is improved in so many ways. I even teach the strokes to pregnant mums using a doll, so they are able to start massaging from the time of baby’s birth."
One participant, a GP and grandmother, said: “It was a wonderful experience to attend the Baby Massage and the Baby Yoga Courses. It is exceptionally useful for bonding, because - through touch and gentle movement - positive communication between the baby and carer is wonderfully stimulated.”
Gurmeet continued: "Baby massage is not just physical - it is about love, acceptance, and being understood, as well as communicating understanding.
It is a tradition in many societies the world over, including Asian and African countries. But in cultures where there is a predominance of life in cities and towns, it is fading.”
Baby massage has also attracted a good deal of scientific interest in the developed world. There is ample evidence to show that it supports the growth and development of the baby and promotes infant-parent bonding, as well as helping the growth of premature babies.
As author Phyllis K Davis wrote in "The Power of Touch": “If I am your baby, please touch me. I need your touch in ways you may never know. Don’t just wash and change and feed me, but rock me close, kiss my face and stroke my body. Your soothing, gentle touch says security and love.”
Adds Gurmeet: "It is the time spent with loving touch by the primary carer above all else that meets the emotional and social needs of a baby, and is invaluable to his or hers present and later life, providing a secure base and a secure attachment with the primary carer."
Gurmeet runs her "Baby Massage" and "Baby Yoga" classes in Slough. Gift coupons are also available. She can be contacted on 07897407507 or 01753511438 or by email at: hans_betterworld@yahoo.com
Gurmeet Hans is the Founder of Nurturing Families, a Certified Instructor of Infant Massage, and a member of the International Association of Infant Massage (see the website linked below).