Enjoying sex - after the menopause

By Jayne Warren - 20/02/2008

Of all the menopausal symptoms to affect a woman's libido, vaginal dryness can be the most difficult to cope with. The soreness and burning during sex can quickly change something that was previously very pleasurable into something very painful. And along with the physical pain is the psychological impact - it's hard to feel both sore and sexy at the same time.

Both these factors can really diminish a woman's sexual confidence, yet giving up sex is not a good option - considering that the condition can be treated. Most women are likely to spend a third of their lives post-menopausal, and remaining sexually active brings immeasurable benefits to us, our partners and to our relationships. A satisfying intimate life is also good for our health and well-being since physical pleasure releases endorphins, the body’s feel-good painkillers. It also improves circulation, makes our skin glow and adds a twinkle to our eyes. 

Then there’s a partner's needs to consider. Whilst many women need an emotional connection to have a fulfilling sexual relationship, men usually need sexual contact in order to feel emotionally close.  And, of course, sex bonds a couple emotionally as well as physically, building a strong sense of partnership and defining the relationship as different from other relationships.

Whichever way a woman addresses problems related to dryness, it can be helpful to discuss the changes with a partner.  Not discussing it and simply withdrawing from your sex life can cause resentment and anger - especially if the partner has no idea why sex has suddenly gone off the agenda. He is more than likely to feel rejected and blame himself - openly or otherwise.

If discussing the problem openly feels hugely embarrassing - you wouldn’t be alone. Only a quarter of women with sexual problems actually seek treatment, and it takes courage to show vulnerability. But perhaps it is worth remembering that it is precisely through sharing our thoughts and feelings with another that we experience true intimacy.

On a practical level, try and find a good, natural lubricant like Omega 7 Sea Buckthorn oil which can maintain the natural lubrication of mucous membranes of the vaginal tract - and as a result transform your intimate life.