Essential knowledge for your survival

12/02/2007

Once you have enough food to fill your stomach, clothes to keep you warm and dry and a roof over your head, you will need some essential information to ensure you survive until the following day. Here are some of the facts you will need to know.

 

Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

 

He who laughs last, thinks slowest.

 

Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.

 

Those who live by the sword get shot by those who don't.

 

The things that come to those who wait will be the things left by those who got there first.

 

The shin bone is a device for finding furniture in a dark room.

 

A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well.

 

When you go into court, you are putting yourself In the hands of 12 people who weren't smart enough to get out of jury duty.

 

This is not a comprehensive survival list - we await your input! email editorial@maturetimes.co.uk