Just In Time ...

01/02/2007

by Roy Clark

 

He stepped on to the bus and placed his Senior Citizen Freedom Pass against the Oyster card machine. It buzzed but then emitted a high-pitched whistle.

“Too early mate” said the driver, “you can’t travel on it till after nine.”

“But it is nine o’clock” said the man.

“Naa, five to”

“Oh, come on, that’s near enough.”

“No mate pay up, one fifty.”

“Oh really, I think you’re being a bit harsh.”

The driver stared at the man, “look, rules is rules mate, oldies only get the fare concession after nine.”

The man looked pleadingly “I know, but I mean, well, but it’s only a couple of minutes before nine o’clock."

“No, urry up, git orf or pay up, one fifty.”

“Oh well, alright, but I must say you’re being awfully mean.”

“Urry up, there’s a load a’people waitin’to git on.”

“Right, now let me see, do I have enough change? No sorry, I only have a ten pound note.”

“Oh blimey mate, I’ve no change for a tenner, git orf and git the next one.”

“No, I’m late already” The man turned and addressed the other passengers “excuse me, has anyone……….”

There followed a fumbling of handbags and trouser pockets as the minutes ticked by.

“’ang on a sec mate, try yer card agin” . The man placed it against the machine, it worked!

“There yer go mate, it’s nine o’clock, ding ding, old tight we’re orf.”

The man made his way up the stairs sat down at the back of the bus. He paused a moment, looked around and then carefully re-adjusted his false beard and grey wig.